What do you think of this? (a rewrite of an old poem of mine)?

Not an atheist nor really a religious person. Perhaps more spiritual. I sometimes think the Universe is the real force. But why feel the need to thank, it's just the result of an experiment and they left a long time ago. ;-) Nice poem. It reminded me of home and the little villages I used to drive thru. It's needs a pub or village square, cricketers playing on the green.